Wednesday, July 14, 2010


I want to go on the record to say I love games.  I love to play and I love to win.  But by that I mean board games, or cards, or even the occasional sporting event (which I never win because those take coordination, which I don't have and understandably, I throw like a girl). 

There is one game, however, I can honestly say I hate, and that is the dating game.  I like games I at least have a chance of winning.  And the dating game doesn't seem to be one I am going to be successful at anytime in the near future-or perhaps ever again.  And to be honest, if that is the way this is all going to go down, I'd rather not get the glimmers of hope.  One thing I have learned from NLNG is that I am ready to date again and I do want another relationship.  But what good is that when your prospects are two men you have zero attraction to and one you are attracted to but makes your head spin while he tries to figure out what he wants?  (Not to mention the 100 matches on eHarmony, of which I had contact with 3:  a man whose main hobby is collecting mushrooms and whose profile had a schedule of which days he'd be doing that, a paraplegic that lived over an hour away and one I can't remember.  Or the scam artist from OkCupid.  Or the married man from the neighboring town who kept checking out my profile, also on OKCupid.  Or the 50+ men on Plenty of Fish who checked out my profile but weren't interested enough to contact me.  Match spared me the agony by just outright rejecting me).  If these are the players, I don't want to play.  I just want to take my marbles and go home and figure out how to accept being alone for the rest of my life. 

I like to play games to have fun and the dating game is not the least bit fun.  I hated it before I met James and I especially hate it now that I've had a taste of how great love can be.  I love being in a relationship, but I hate dating.  Sadly, you can't have one without the other.  I'm not a quitter usually.  But I quit.  I call "Uncle."

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