I am sure you must have a really important reason for calling me; otherwise you probably wouldn't have left me messages everyday for the last several days. I would love to speak with you to clear up this obviously pressing matter, but in order for that to happen, I need you to please do one of the following:
- Have a real person leave a message letting me know what this is regarding so I know which of the 5 options to choose when I call back the 1-866 number you are at least nice enough to repeat so I can write it down.
- Change your automated message ever so slightly to inform me which of the aforementioned 5 options I should choose when calling you back.
- Add a 6th menu option of "I am returning your call and have no idea which of your 5 menu options I am supposed to choose because your automated message doesn't tell me squat."