Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Her name is Lola

Last night I was laying in bed thinking about James, Widower Friend and Volunteer Guy and about how boys pretty much suck.

"It's December 1st" randomly popped into my head. "Yes," I thought back, "it is. What does that have to do with anything?"

"Tomorrow is December 2nd!"

"That usually follows the 1st." Even my thought process is sarcastic.

"It's Lola's birthday."

"I should see if she is on Facebook."

I don't usually blog using the names of the living so this is a rare exception. Being that today is indeed December 2nd, it is my cousin Lola's 28th birthday. She is my second to youngest first cousin on my mother's side. Her father is my mother's younger brother. He is also the youngest of four-and the only son. Lola, to the best of my knowledge, is his only biological child. He had a couple of stepsons (Lola's half-brothers) at one time that were the same ages as my brother and I.

Today when I came home to let the dogs out at lunch, I did a quick search on Facebook for my cousin. There were several Lolas with her last name, but none were her. It occurred to me that she could be married by now and not have included her maiden name on the site.

I decided to do a Google search. In the ads on the right hand side of the screen, proudly proclaimed "We found Lola!" So, I looked at their listings. I found her. I know it was the right one because the relatives listed were her father and our grandmother. I didn't pay for the record. Considering that Grandma died in 1994, I am just not sure how reliable that is. (I did a Intellius search for myself just for grins and my relatives are my deceased father, my brother and both ex-stepmothers).

I saw a link for Lola on Myspace, so I decided to search there and I did find her. She is definitely not the little girl I remember from, oh I don't know, 20 years ago. I have to say, seeing her pictures made me feel more than just a little frumpy! I had been planning to send her a note if I found her, but when I did, I lost my nerve. I don't know if she even remembers me. She was mostly raised by my uncle and Grandma and Mom and Grandma were pretty close so I am sure we were mentioned from time to time. However, she was only 12 when Grandma died. And then I thought "what is this cool person going to want from a strait-laced geek like me?"

But the bottom line is we are family and I don't really have a connection with anyone from Mom's side despite having tried to establish a relationship with my cousins who are a couple of years older than me a couple of times in the past. (I did just find them on Facebook and sent friend requests). My cousin that I am really close with is not actually my cousin-she's James'. We just adpoted each other after he died, for which I am so grateful. She is so awesome! So, I got over myself and sent Lola a note explaining who I was and wishing her a happy birthday. I know I got the right girl because her brother is one of her friends (so much for Mom's story that both her brothers had died. I am pretty sure when I tell Mom at least one of them is still alive she is going to tell me I am wrong).

All I can do now is wait and see if she responds (and try to get "Copa Cabana" out of my head. My cousin is not a showgirl, however). And if not, at least I tried.

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